When I told people that I was having my first official dinner date with the F.C. at my apartment,  it was greeted with some controversy. Questions and comments included, “Isn’t cooking at your place a lot of pressure?” Or, “Sounds too intense for an early date.”

 

Well I say cooking chez toi is way less intense and pressured than eating in a restaurant.  Okay, I admit I’m a control freak– and home is a place I already know and feel good in. No annoying waiter, no bad music and no awkward moment when the bill arrives. And the cooking part gives me chance to parade around in a pretty outfit; stirring, chopping, and twirling around like a kitchen nymph.  What’s high stress about that?

 

That said, I agree, there are also risks. So here’s my checklist for ways to come off as a domestic goddess (not Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction.)

 

Six Tips to a Perfect First Date Dinner Chez Toi

 

1. De-spinster your apartment; removing all but one of your seven cats, bridal magazines and anything that seems too controlled or perfect. Your place should be relaxed, not nutty.
2. Don’t pick a complicated dish. My Man Trap Moules Frites says I’m sexy and chill, but Foie Gras-Stuffed Roast Turkey and Baked Alaska says I’m desparate. Spend your extra energy — and money — looking hot.
3. Don’t invite a total unknown. The first date dinner chez toi is only for the cock you’ve already sparked with, like I did with my French cock.
4. Sprinkle loose change on the floor; a quarter here, dime and penny there. I don’t know why, but guys like finding money and giving it to you. It’s the retriever in them. If they pocket it, you’ll know they’re freaks and can scratch them off your list forever.
5. Turn off or dim all overhead lighting. A kitchen that’s bright enough for a dentist to work on your back molars isn’t conducive to romance, and very unforgiving on your skin. 
6. If you have a roommate, pick a night when they’re out. If not, it’s okay for a roomie to pass through and say hi, even sample the food and wine. Good roomies give you “context.” They show Mr. Cock that you have others in your life who care about you. However, if your roomie is too much of a wild card (talking about past boyfriends or how much you stunk up the bathroom yesterday morning) stick to the plan of making sure they’re not home and, yeah, try to find a new roomie.

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